The reality is, some of us live in a world where we need to learn how to relax! Relaxation is a natural, bodily process which keeps us functioning in an optimal way: emotionally, spiritually, and physically. The page, Tips for Coping With Stress, describes anxiety, how it originates, and ways to cope with it. This page gives you some ideas for how to reduce tension in your daily life. It also describes hyperventilation syndrome, which results in the uncomfortable symptoms of a panic attack.

As with any physical symptom, please check with your doctor to rule out any medical cause for your anxiety. Although there are few physical disorders that result in panic-like symptoms, there are some, and you need to rule those out before finding help here!

Hyperventilation Syndrome: I Feel Like I'm Going to Die! (Panic)

Of course, we'll all die at some time or another. For people in the throes of hyperventilation, death feels as though it will arrive at any moment. People suffering from hyperventilation syndrome (I'll abbreviate it as HVS) feel a variety of things. First: mild disorientation, dread, dizziness, feelings of unreality, and/or lightheadedness. Next: heart pounding, racing heart, sweating palms, breaking out in a sweat all over, 'hot flashes,' nausea, feelings of dread, fear of death or fainting or going crazy, claustrophobia (for example, 'if only I can get out of here and get home I'll be okay'), feelings of suffocation/not being able to get enough air. Last: tunnel vision, actually fainting (this is very rare, and the act of fainting stops the syndrome).

In normal breathing, one breathes in about the same amount of oxygen as one exhales carbon dioxide. (Carbon dioxide is a byproduct of metabolizing oxygen). Hyperventilation means that you are breathing in more oxygen than you need. You are actually taking in more oxygen than you are exhaling carbon dioxide. Therefore, carbon dioxide builds up in your blood. This happens when you take quick, shallow breaths without the accompanying physical exertion that would require more oxygen. And you have no idea you are doing it!

Our ancient ancestors needed the ability to quickly escape from predators and other threats, and to quickly respond to a fleeing animal when hunting. The 'fight-or-flight' response enabled early humans to perform these tasks. In modern day life, we rarely need such a dramatic physical response. Chasing the dog at the beach doesn't require quite the same level of physiological readiness as did running from a charging animal! Nevertheless, our bodies haven't evolved out of the fight-or-flight response. Anxiety triggers the hyperventilation/fight-or-flight response in our bodies, and unless we restore the oxygen/carbon dioxide balance quickly, the symptoms will increase until we pass out and automatically begin breathing normally again, or learn how to resolve this unpleasant breathing situation first.

Tips for Coping With Anxiety and Panic Attacks

Once you've had a physical and your doctor has determined your anxiety is not due to a medical disorder, he or she might prescribe anti-anxiety drugs. These drugs are designed to block the fight-or-flight response, as well as more generalized anxiety. They work, but they are potentially addictive, and mostly unnecessary. You can learn to stop anxiety attacks cold.

Let those close to you know you are suffering from anxiety, and that you may need help staying with these when the moment arises:

For panic...

Breathe into a paper bag. Although you might be embarrassed to try this, once you begin to notice panic rising, pull out a paper bag and breathe into it, slowly, in and out, for a minute or two. You are filling the bag with carbon dioxide and thereby reducing the amount of oxygen you're breathing. OR...

Slow your breath. Count your breath. Breathe in to a count of four, hold your breath for two, breath out to a count of four. If this is difficult for you, understand that you have been hyperventilating! Work up to a count of six, two, and six. Do this for two minutes. Remember, actually you have too much oxygen, so regulating your breathing will only help you.

Read a book. Some excellent books for help coping with anxiety attacks are Claire Weekes' classics, "Self-Help for Your Nerves," and "Peace From Nervous Suffering."

Look at beautiful, calming images or watch a movie you loved as a child.

For general anxiety...

Relax your body. It is actually not possible to feel anxious when your body is fully relaxed. Therefore, progressively tensing and relaxing each part of your body, while breathing in and out slowly as described above, will help you reduce anxiety.

Take a vacation from upsetting images. Social media, in particular, has been found by research to actually cause anxiety and depression, particularly in young people, as well as in those vulnerable to mood disorders. Limit your consumption of visual news and advertising--both are designed by cognitive psychologists to maximize the time you spend watching, which means flashing images, lights, sounds are designed to actually upset your nervous system just enough to keep you there, looking for a remedy. Which never comes.

Take breaks from screens. See above. Relentless bad news is actually (and oddly) good for ratings. The color red is stimulating to the nervous system. Flashing light, quick "cuts" in ads, films, series condition our brains to shorter and shorter attention spans, and creates anxiety. Spend time around real people and pets, and the real, natural world. Nature is the great healer. Try turning your screens off for an entire weekend and reflect on how you feel on Monday morning. There are many "calming" apps out there. Sound Machine apps give you soothing sounds without the screen.

Nourish your spirit. People with a spiritual practice tend to report experiencing less stress in their daily lives. Explore religious or spiritual practices and communities that interest you, by attending services, taking classes, reading books, or joining online groups. "The Best Spiritual Writing of..." or "The Best Science Writing of..." yearly series is inspiring.

Visualize. Calm your mind by imagining yourself in a place you love that soothes you. Imagine every detail of the place, including how relaxed you are when you are there. Do this when you are not anxious, too, and repeat "Relax" to yourself over and over. Then, if you do find yourself anxious, repeat the same word to yourself and call up the image of the beloved place.

Books on relaxation abound. Many of them have soothing pictures in them, too!

Read Tips for Coping With Stress.